KEEPING IT REAL

Reality television can certainly be addictive.  I always feel so much better about myself after I witness the crazy antics that go on in the lives of others.  The shows that really keep my attention are the ones where a person is using their talents to compete...think Project Runway, Top Chef, or America's Next Top Model.  I am never going to be a fashion designer (I could not even learn to sew in a community college class) and modeling or cooking...okay you don't have to laugh.  So why am I so intrigued? 

Basically, you can separate the contestants into two categories.  You either are super confident and act as if nobody other than you exists, or you are insecure, and therefore have to put others down to make yourself feel better.  You rarely see someone that just comes into the experience knowing who they are inside and feeling no threat from others.  The essence of competing is that we want to win and desire others to fail.  I cannot tell a lie, I love when the cast members turn on each other.  When they have those one on one video diaries where the person basically just tells you everything they are thinking.  Can you imagine if during some moment in our days we ducked into a bathroom and shared with a video crew how we felt about our neighbors, coworkers, or even family members?  Ugh...that could get really ugly. 

Life can sometimes feel like a competition when we constantly compare ourselves to others.  We are waiting for someone to hold up a paddle and give us a score.  We become exhausted because there is no end in sight...when are they going to announce the winner?  I kind of vacillate between the individual that is positive and self-assured and the scared victim that knows she can never succeed. Either way, I give far too much weight to what everyone else is doing around me.  I can easily get caught up in wanting praise and affirmation from the crowd that serves as my panel of judges.  What happens when we discover that we don't have what it takes to be on top?  How can we cope with the truth that we are miserable in our quest to please everyone?  Maybe we should retreat into a dark room with sickening amounts of snack food and hunker down for an all day marathon of Keeping up with the Kardashians.  Yeah...that show captures my reality!!!

The truth is that God gave me unique qualities and circumstances that cannot be replicated by another human being alive.  Nobody can be a better Jamie Valvano Howard than me.  What a shame if I spent all my time trying to be like someone else and lost my purpose in the process.  I can learn quite a bit from opening my eyes and heart to the people that have been placed in my life, but nobody can guide my steps better than the One that knows every path I will travel.  I don't need to put anybody down so that I can get ahead.  Just think how we would make others feel if we embraced and celebrated the skills we saw in them without feeling like that gesture would somehow make our own lights appear dimmer.

Here and now think of yourself as the star of your own reality show.  The purpose of this journey is to share as much love and kindness with everyone that you meet.  Don't worry about the other contestants because they cannot alter the divine plan and purpose for your life.  Remember to use the gifts that you have been given to help you not only survive but to prosper as you move ahead. There is but one judge and although you might not always score a perfect 10, I promise you will have a reward in the end.  Oh, and about that video diary. When you feel so overwhelmed and you just need to get it all out before you explode...fall to your knees and start talking...no camera necessary. 





You are the star of something far more real than anything we see on television...